Sporadic Thoughts Day 3

Woke up regretting something I shouldn’t of done in the first place this morning, so immediately after I prayed. I felt a little better after, had an off day yesterday wasn’t in the best of moods. But something’s you can control, most of it’s in gods hands and the natural course of life.

One thing I’m realising and accepting more, is that life’s what you make it; you get back whatever energies you put out. Fact is this thing called “life”  gives you a clean slate, a second chance every single day. All you need is to be firm that be it today or tomorrow you have a shot to make that day mean something, you just gotta make sure you start. For most including myself starting is the difficult part.

Another lesson learnt is this:

People come and go but but it’s mad how life works I’ve still got love for so many people we just drifted but that’s life taking it’s course. I can make new memories & moments with new people and if old faces reappear then great! And if not then shit just know i’m championing and pushing you to win in life from somewhere in the distance.

Lesson number 3 

You can’t control anyone but yourself so don’t let them dictate your happiness “

We’re all different as humans have our own good and own shortcoming’s but in the same breath I’ve spent too long being upset over people, I’ve always looked out for others before myself I’ve never spoke up on what I want, nah not anymore I deserve to and have a right to be happy being down ALL THE TIME is sooooooo exhausting and I just don’t have the energy for it, why waste energies when you can save them and use it to do good for the world.

Life’s for living man, be good be kind and surround yourself with people that lift you up. Create moments and make memories cause you never know what’s around the corner. When alls said and done you can’t look back when life and god gave you chance after chance to make life what it’s meant to be.

Light, laughter love and good vibes.
I’ve always been fearful of being a role model to and for disabled people and able bodied people within sport but more and more I’m ok with it, I used to hear people say “you could inspire so many people” and my body would freeze up but man listen I used to think being “inspirational” was soft, made me weak, but the people and environment made me feel that way. But motivating and inspiring is what I’m meant to be.

Life’s thrown so much at me but Every.Single. Time.  I come out gloves off swinging and ready,  there are times when it feels like I have no energy left but I made it this far, through my mother being ill, friends passing away an absent father my disability, growing up with domestic violence and mental abuse. Through all of that?! I’m still living and breathing? I still have more than most and I’m thankful everyday.

To, Mom , my aunt, my nan, my sister and my two brothers. My entire world. I am the man I am because of you we never had a lot or much real family but we’ve got each other. Because of you I bust my ass everyday because of you I know what love should be. Because of you I’ll be the man my father will never be.

Anyway, I’m off to my lecture now.
Peace.

Shumul

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